Tina Games discusses the importance of a “happy mother” and how it affects the “legacy ripple” – with Tamara Gold, creator of The Red Lipstick Report
Imagine for a moment a pebble thrown into a pond. It creates a ripple that goes on and on and on. I believe that mothers are a significant part of the ripple effect – that will transform the world into a more loving, more nurturing place.
When a mother is living life with complete authenticity, she’s subconsciously giving permission for her kids to do the same. She’s truly at her best – creating powerful change for herself, her family, her community – and for the world at large. It’s all part of “the ripple.”
It’s my belief that “a happy mother makes the best mother” – and our kids really do want to see their moms happy!
But what if something goes awry – and “the ripple” stems from a place of frustration, confusion, disconnect or unhappiness?
My transformational work with mothers came out of my own experience of connecting with the moon during a really dark period in my life. Shortly after the birth of my first child, and after making some fairly significant life changes at the same time, I fell into depression – a place that felt so foreign to me, a place where I felt like I had fallen into a black hole with no way out. It was during this time, a period that spanned over two years, that I had disconnected from everything that made me happy. Because my son suffered from chronic illnesses related to serious colds and severe ear infections, I made a very difficult choice to give up a successful career in order to care for my son full-time. I hadn’t realized until this experience how much of my identity was tied into my career. Without it, I felt very lost and very unhappy.
It was during this time that I fell back on a great passion of mine – journal writing. And as a mom of a baby who did not have a normal sleep schedule, I found myself exhausted and emotional much of the time. So night after night, after I’d get my son settled and after my husband went to bed, I’d grab my journal and retreat to my favorite chair – beside a big bay window where I caught a glimpse of the moon. It was the moon that taught me the meaning of transition. I’d watch this beautiful lunar goddess, night after night, move in and out of her various phases. And before long, I began to connect her phases with my own emotional tides.
I noticed that the moon always began in darkness and gradually, she’d move into full light – and cycle back around again. And I noticed the contrast between dark and light – the darkness of the night sky against the beautiful full moon light. I started connecting to this – as if I was being divinely guided through my own transitions of dark and light. I began to notice the ebbs and flows of my emotions. There were good days and bad days.
So when I came to the point of writing my book, Journaling by the Moonlight: A Mother’s Path to Self-Discovery, I wanted mothers to realize that every human transition begins in darkness and gradually moves into light, where we get a glimpse of what is possible. And then we retreat, to ponder the many ways we can manifest these possibilities into reality. This requires deep work, where we step into our own truth and into our own power – and where we can emerge in the most authentic way possible. This is what I call the Blue Moon phase – when we finally realize that we are here on this Earth to be WHO we are, to put our personal thumbprint on the world in the most truthful, most authentic, most unique way possible. Each one of us are individuals being divinely guided on our own purposeful path.
Because moms are natural role models, our kids are observing all the time. There’s a lot of truth in the saying, “Monkey see, monkey do.” In other words, when a mom is modeling the value of following her heart, her kids get it – much more than they would if she was just saying it. Kids feel energy. They know when a person is happy and when they’re not. So why not be happy – and let the ripple flow?
Wouldn’t the world be a much better place if we were all following our hearts? If we could truly live life with passion and purpose, everything would have a richer and deeper meaning. It would create a ripple of positive and loving energy that could literally heal the world.
Each and every one of us has the power to create great change in the world. And this change has the most impact when we begin with ourselves – looking in the mirror and honoring the person who is staring back.
WHO is this person? Do you really know her at her core? If you were to remove every label that she wears – mother, wife, partner, community leader, business owner, loyal friend, etc. – who is she?
Imagine for a moment – each of these labels being a blanket. Slowly remove each blanket, acknowledging the label it represents, and set it aside. Continue doing this until you have no more labels except – SELF.
Who is SELF? Take a moment to describe SELF from the inside out. How do you feel when you’re not bombarded by what the world thinks you should be? What are your passions? What are your dreams? What makes you come alive? How does this person – from the inside out – want to show up in the world?
These are great questions to ponder in your journal, allowing yourself to answer them – truthfully and completely.
When we start chipping away at the exterior labels, what do we look like on the inside? What is our “diamond in the rough?”
Once we discover this, we’ve connected with our authentic self. And it’s from this place where purposeful, powerful and magical ripples are created.
What kind of ripple are you sending out?